Getting it Right
What's more disappointing -- getting a gift that you don't like or giving one that lands flat?
About a month ago my friend, Stacy, told me that she had given her dad a book for him to record his memories and stories. Each page had a prompt to make it easy and fun. Her dad has been writing his whole life and had time on his hands. Perfect, right?
Stacy's father never even opened the book.
It is a great gift. Just not for Stacy's father.
Here's the thing -- it's about the experience.
Some people journal every day. This person enjoys the space and silence to reflect and has an established, consistent writing practice. She doesn't wordsmith. She's stays out of her head and writes from the heart. The memory book works really well for people in this group.
There are those who like writing but only when they're motivated. For this person, a whole book of questions may be daunting and he could go weeks without writing. Plus, he may not like some of the questions, so those pages would be left blank. If you've ever received an Incomplete for a class, you know the guilt people in this group feel every time they see the book on their night stand. Better to store out of sight.
Most people are neither regular journalers or comfortable writers. Putting thoughts and feelings on paper is really hard for this person. Birthday cards can even be a challenge! For this person, the book would feel like an assignment. So while she may answer the written prompts, it would be just enough to get through it. She may feel like she's accomplished something afterwards, but she may or may not have enjoyed the experience.
It's not that people are averse to thinking about their past or sharing their stories. How it's done makes all the difference.
I've found that when someone shows a genuine interest in someone's life, the person will open up. When someone listens - patiently and intently - and asks follow-up questions, the conversation flows. This goes for introverts, extraverts, writers, conversationalists...you name it.
Everyone has stories to share and almost everyone has a willingness to share them. The gift is the experience of recalling and sharing those stories. The format is the vehicle.
The memory book is the perfect gift for some people. For others, it takes a conversation. Which experience would be most fulfilling for your loved one?
I'm here for you. Reach out to schedule a free Discovery Call where we'll explore:
which format would be best for you to gift to your loved one.
the options for facilitating guided conversations to capture his or her stories.
the Familial gift experience.
Can't wait to connect with you!