The Beauty of Being Neutral

My mother and I cover a lot of ground, but some things are off limits.

Like I can say something funny or sweet about my father, but nothing heavy that will make her cry. And when she starts a conversation with, "I'm worried that...." I immediately try to change course because trust me, there's nothing that will alleviate my mother's fierce worry.

During Covid, I worked with her on her letter. We had a bunch of long phone calls and she had a blast  recounting wonderful memories. 

But guess what? I avoided certain topics. I didn't ask about my grandfather's death a year after my parents got married or my father's lengthy illness. Basically, I avoided the struggles.

But if she were a client I would have asked :

• What got you through these major challenges?

• What were the takeaways?

I get how difficult it is to talk to about hard topics with those closest to us. Even I skipped the tough stuff. That's left me curious about how she dealt with these major life events. 

This is where a neutral party comes in. 

I don't shy from asking my clients about tough times. And get this...my clients don't hesitate to answer!